Jayne’s Race Report

The John and Dulcie Walker Road Race – Sunday 16th September 2007

I had my special formula in my bottle—1/3 Red Bull, 1/3 Coca-Cola, 1/3 water (honest), left overnight to de-effervesce. I had learnt the hard way about fizzy drinks! Brian Wright had prepped me with clues to winning – all involving peddling a bit sharpish. I was keen!

Well, the HQ in Cheddington was brimming with the crème de la crème of the lycra-wearing, cycling fraternity (paternity, in some cases), some of whom snubbed the usual facilities and changed in the hall. “Life doesn’t get better than this,” I thought.

I had been under the impression that I was the only female contender (in my head I was going to be 1st, 2nd and 3rd). Consider my dismay when I spotted something hard and sinewy with breasts signing on! I was going to have to use something more than ability to see off this one, I could tell!

Well the E’s, 1sts and 2nds all shot off, like they do. Then us 4ths and 3rds went off at a bit of a clip, and I soon found myself at the back of the bunch (but I was thinking of you, Miles!). The view was quite nice, but I knew that Brian would not be pleased and something had to be done! I found that by going right over in to the path of oncoming traffic, I was able to pick off several riders at a time. The patrol car hooted its encouragement—must have had a Willesden driver in it!
After just one lap (about 10 miles) disaster struck; my front wheel punctured, and all hopes of glory evaporated! Barely had I time to burst into tears when Jumbo, spotting an opportunity, slipped a fluorescent gillet over my head and a red flag into my hand. As riders came whizzing down the road and in to a very sharp left-hand turn , it was my job to startle the on-coming cars into swerving out, in order to pick off anybody who had stupidly swung too wide. Oh, how I laughed!
Anyway, round and round they went. Two hours later, it was back up to HQ for tea and buns and clapping and cheering. Various blokes from various clubs won assorted prizes; Ray and Jumbo said some nice things; and I tried to pass my number to the rather dashing chap who won the cup.

To summarise:-
Richard Jerome won out of the Willesden men
Jayne Paine won out of the Willesden women
and we all had a very jolly day!

Jayne Paine
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